Dreams – originally written in 2000

I sit here thinking

Of dreams from the past few days.

Pen in my hand, writing works in Romantic ways I sit waiting.

As my life moves like a slow moving train

Cheating songs pumping through my brain.

Thinking of you so far away,

Of the new man who asks you to stay.

Sometimes I wonder if your ever thinking,

How far my heart is sinking

When your so far away.

I sit here thinking of so many words I could say.

Wishing I could take back the mistakes I’ve made.

I remember every time I’d see your smile fade

Trying not to remember the words the whiskey made me say.

I wish you could see the tears in my eyes today.

When I dream of how you and me used to be.

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Change

Every time my life is changed; it changes all the time

I come up to my book and put it to a rhyme

When I think of change; my heart it skips a beat

But every time I stop to think, I think it’s all to right

Because I’m scared of defeat, I tend to lean away

And into the darkness I will come

Where no one see’s the way

But every time I think I’m lost

There is always someone there

With change behind me and a hand stretched out

I will slowly begin to realize the time I lost to change

Was shorter than the time I won

When love had caused the change.

A pair of poems from a military deployment

Fading Flame

Why is love too much for a man to handle

Why do I extinguish it like the flame on a candle

What’s so hard about telling her what I feel

Why do I want a heart that other men may steal

Will the one I love be willing to love me?

What is this mind trap that will not let me free

What internal mechanism hold me

Why can’t I see

She can love a man like me?

The Birds

As I watch mechanical birds in the sky

I sit and watch and wonder as they speed by

What if one day they can’t fly

What if one day they don’t rule the sky

What would be the world if the birds didn’t fly now

If all these birds they didn’t know how

It would be harder indeed

It would leave nothing easy for me

The birds will be flying from now till then

They will be from now till past my end.

A Shadow

A silhouette standing alone above the water.

His black overcoat blowing in the wind.

A large black hat tilted to cover his face.

He stands alone on the rocks above the ocean.

With his haves in his pockets he stands quietly.

Grabbing his hat when the wind blows, as the rain falls.

Living in a world that will never falter,

He listens as if the water calls.

Disappearing as the walls of water break over the rocks.

Raising his head, he’s engulfed in the mist.

The skies clear and the shadows gone.

Has he gone over the edge?

… or was he ever there?

A Poor Man’s Dreams

An unwanted man sits in a corner,

Thinking of the love he has lost.

With every minute of life gone by,

This lonely man’s thinking, “Lord, Just let me die.”

Beautiful woman pass him by each day,

They drop change in his hand, but have nothing to say.

He is offered a shelter, but to proud to sleep under it.

Eats a meal in a homeless shelter.

Reading letters he never sent her.

He dreams of the day he can treat her,

Like the princess she is to him.

He dreams of a life secure,

In the arms of a woman like her.

To him she’s a princess.

To her he’s just like the rest.

He plans out the day they’ll meet .

She walks on the same old beat.

Dressed up in a suit of blue,

She doesn’t have a clue,

That this bum’s heart is true.

With every step she makes,

She’s always in his sight.

What a safer walk it takes,

When he don’t walk with her at night.

My Angel in the Sky

I seen my angel in the sky

Bright blue sparkle in her eyes

Seeing within her an Amazing Grace

To brighten up my grey face

I once had love upon my heart

Till from this world she did part

Eyes that sparked, hair that glowed

and Love to me that always showed

I hate the man who took her from me

I wish I’d been there, I wish I could of…

Then I would of stopped him.  Yes, I would of…

Then my angel in the sky

With that sparkle in her eye

Looked upon my face

And started to sing Amazing Grace

Then she looked to my departed

And upon her face a smile started

The angel faded but pointed downward

And she disappeared as I looked onward

To my loved ones face of grey.

Her eyes were open and she did say

“I can see the sparkle in your eye.”

I replied, “I got it from the Angel in the Sky.”

A Child’s Christmas

In the eyes of our children

Santa Claus is the man

Who flew over the hills with his reindeer in his command

He lands on the rooftops and slides down the chimney

Putting presents under the Christmas tree

As he finishes, he looks up and giggles, for on a table

Sits cookies and a glass of milk all sitting on a Christmas note.

Hello Santa,

  These are for you.

              Love,

              Mandy, John and Paul

was wrote. 

Santa laughed and his belly jiggled

As he put his finger to his nose, he giggled.

As he vanished in the air

To another house somewhere

Don’t you wish sometimes,

That you were a child at Christmas time.

The Unfaithful Soldier

Trust is an unfaithful soldier

Built of the heartbreak and pain of others

Commitment is a dream of that soldier

A dream of a dream about the sanity of realistic expectations

Faithfulness is a promise to yourself that you cannot honor

Honor is an object of others and doesn’t belong in a selfish world. 

Fear is the loss of trust.  A realization that the soldier was real to itself. 

A realization that Trust was itself unfaithful.