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Anxiety Journal Unsorted Posts

Author (Freewriting) Dec 23, 2014

I’m watching the latest Paranormal Activities movie, good reason why I can’t write but still.  I just don’t have any energy to write.  I’m going to have to force myself to write.  I’m writing this post just to free write something.  Paranormal Activity 4 is a very interesting return to the original intention of the franchise.  My opinion, of course but I find the setting within the Latino community very interesting.  It adds to the mythology of these movies.  They also add a lot more supernatural events.  The characters are played very well by unknowns.  It’s back to “what the hell is going to happen?”

To other stuff… what about a story mixing monsters and supernatural horror like Paranormal Activity.

Hmmm.. a new twist.. someone took the main character..

I know this is all over the place but I need to write something.. been watching Helix.  Completed the first season.  Very good series about CDC scientist trying to fix extreme sci fi infections.. I think these days are excellent for fans of sci fi.

They are approaching a thin, white door.  The camera light fails as they walk in.  Inside the room is a fake head and some covered appliances.  They are searching for their brother in an old house.  Currently looking inside a horse stall.  Yikes.. crazy witches.. lol

They are inside the house with the witches outside staring.. looks like a goat head inside a pentagram.  They are looking at a window intensely till someone bangs on it.  Marisol is missing…

Oops.. she fell from the ceiling now Hector is running around the house screaming.  This would be intensely frightening if I was in this house.  All sorts of crazy things going on.. He’s opening the door… everything is quiet…

Till Jesse shows up and chases him.. yikes

Wow.. he broke down the door.. now Hector runs through a door and he is in the original Paranormal Activity house..

Scary zombie woman walking around.. ok.. he’s dead..

Nice..

Categories
Anxiety Journal

Work Anxiety

Made some mistakes at work today.  Have this overwhelming umbrella of paranoia and anxiety over this job.  Everything is perfect and the job loves me but I keep getting this feeling that something is going wrong.  Something is going to come up.  Someone is going to say, “I’m sorry but we have to boot you from the project.  You are just not working out anymore.”

I even feel that I am not giving 100%.  So much going on at work and more going on at home.  I’m overtired and wore out everyday.  It’s like I work 24 hours a day.. anyway.. that’s my speal..have a good day..

P.S. Check out my new post in City of Zombies later.. I haven’t written it yet but today is the day.  I don’t know if they are going to head to grandma’s or the safehouse.. maybe grandma is the safehouse or in the safehouse.. something.. should be interesting

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Anxiety Journal

Wow, I have an anxiety problem

Super stressed today.  Started work with an application down issue.  I took control of the issue and now have the responsibility of making sure a good solution is presented.  I’ve run through the last week wondering if I’m fooling everyone about my skills as a programmer.  How do you convince yourself you know what your doing?  I’ve got everyone else convinced, even though I worry they can see right through me.  That last thing is so contradictory.  How can I convince everyone but be scared they aren’t?  Isn’t the beginning a confident statement followed by crap?  My girls continue to aggravate me.  Like on on a tightrope, above a bridge and it swings wildly in the wind.  I have this tiny voice in my head telling me to be calm and respectable to my children.  They will remember the worse moments but then, Big Sarge takes over and barks his orders.  It’s insane.. its like two people arguing over who can be the better parent.  I would rather have this argument with my wife.  Second, third or fourth.. I don’t care.. I’m tired.. I go to bed at 11:30-12 and wake up at 6:30.  I can just blame today’s issue on that

Categories
Anxiety Journal

New Posts (Anxiety Journal)

My anxiety is really high today.  I don’t know the cause, just know my children make it worse.  I heard on the radio someone started writing a journal.  This is a public writing blog and I thought what better exercise then writing thoughts that prevent me from being happy.  Anyways, I have money and child discipline activities on my mind.  The family may move soon so that pressure is growing. “Do I have enough money to move?”  Will I have enough money? I need to find a new job.  What if they don’t like me?  What if my current success is a fluke?  What if the new place is worse than this place..

Anyways, post number 1.. I hope it makes me feel better